Sometimes You Make Lemonade

The thing about traveling is you make the best of it, no matter what happens.  So when you get a cold shower in a cheap-o hotel your paying more for than the last town, you run in place afterwards.  When you're waiting for the bus for 30 minutes, and find out no buses are running, you start walking.  When heat and ants get into your prized bag of baby carrots, you try for nothing but net when aiming for the garbage.

But what about when the last 4 towns you've visited are over-priced, tourist traps?  And machismo runs rampant?  And you apparently have a bullseye on your forehead and money falling out of your pockets, because you're getting circled by taxi drivers and crappy souvenier sellers trying to make a buck?  And even if your husband planned it? 

In Kyle's defense the past few less than desirable stops weren't on his Top 10 Places to See list or anything, but we're en route to Puerto Vallarta for Easter, and wanting to be sure we got there in the right amount of time and beating the crowds for Semana Senta, he devised a plan.  The plan being to stay the bigger towns along the coast where bus routes naturally start and stop.  But neither of us have liked it!  It's meant paying more for a hotel and food and being in gringo-flooded towns where natives won't speak their own language because most whiteys don't know it.  Something about the machismo has seemed to been enhanced in these towns too, because the people here are all looking to Kyle more to do all the talking and have all the opinions.  I'm a liberated woman here people, I mean no when I don't want the stupid lacey sunhat, and you don't need to look to my man to make sure he won't buy it for me.  I speak better Spanish anyway, come on now people!

Now don't get me wrong, I'm super happy to be chilling on beaches and swimming illegally in the pool at the Hyatt, but Kyle and I are off-the-beaten path sort of travlers, so it's not entirely my cup of tea to flock where eveyone has already flocked.  So, it's been a "fun" couple of days really working out the traveling companion + husband & wife scenario, but Kyle and I worked out a modified plan we're both comfortable with.  In the 5 days pre-Puerto Vallarta (PV), we were all set to rent a car and drive the coast stopping in the towns we were interested in, staying in towns that appeal to us, and leaving the rest in our dust. 

I of course had already been driving in our cute little vintage Beetle a few hours before Hertz informed us it would be $350 to drop the car in our final destination about 15 hours up the coast.  No problem!  Plan B then would be to take a bus to PV rent a car there and explore!  Uh huh, except that because it's Semana Santa, the week leading into Easter, every Juan, Maria, and Carmen are on the road visiting family and enjoying their holidays, so the next bus ticket up the coast would be the Tuesday AFTER Easter, a week and a half away.  This meant that not only were we not going to enjoy our rental car dream, but we couldn't get tickets to the next town Kyle had sensibly put on our agenda.

Plan reality?  Us deciding together the next place we'd explore.  The city of Guadelajara.  It throws off our beach front tour up the Pacific coast, but we're both looking forward to the change of lifestyle and adventuring off in the sunset somewhere unexpected.

One thing that I'll say for tourist trap sorts of towns is that it's given us some great hispanics speaking English:
- "Amigos, want boat ride?  Smoke weed?"
- Dude holds up his arm with about 20 uber generic ugly sunglasses and asks "How many?"  Like we might take a baker's dozen or something.
- Sitting on the beach guy selling hats says, "Want hats?  Many colors."  After Kyle's firm protests the guy continues, "For the pretty señorita, nice hat with blue?" 
- "Amigos!  Happy Hour - want drinks?" 
Us: "It's barely noon.  No drinks right now."
Dude: I bring you cold beer, margarita, daquiri for the lady.  Happy Hour 2 for 1.
Kyle: "Is there any time it's not Happy Hour here?"
Dude: "You want cold water?"